I recently realised just how uncomfortable I was with change.

It sounds stupid, doesn't it? Change is everywhere, all the time. There is change in the weather, in the food we eat, in the people we talk to. We face it throughout our lives, sometimes consciously and sometimes not. I feel like I should have become mostly accustomed to it by now, of things being in flux and never remaining the same.

Yet the thought of having to adjust and adapt just makes me twitchy. I guess it's not so much the arrival of new things which scares me, but rather the prospect of losing what is familiar and near. The thought of not being able to go back to my equilibrium-the place of safety I'd grown comfortable in-terrifies and excites me in equal measure, which is an odd sensation to bear. I guess there's a conflict because I told myself at the start that I wanted to get out of my comfort zone this year and make full use of opportunities thrown my way, but now I think that's easier said than done. -_- I do want to venture into foreign places and situations and conversations and learn more about what is around me. That hasn't changed; I want to be open to new possibilities. But it's hard trying to figure out just how big a step I'm willing to take and whether it's a step in the right direction or not.

While we're here, I should also mention how choices scare me too. I do remember writing about it before lol that goes to show how little I have changed.

It's just that I hate the feeling of making decisions, because of opportunity cost. (Hah! Econs) If I take option A, that would mean option B is closed off. No big deal, but what if option B was better?? It wouldn't matter in situations where a do-over was possible, but most of the time our decisions are pretty much irreversible, aren't they? You can pick apple juice over orange juice, realise you don't like it, then go back and get orange juice instead. But you're not gonna get back the money you spent on that apple juice. And sometimes when you return, there's no more orange juice left.

At this point you're probably going to nag at me to get over myself and be thankful for freedom of choice since it's like human rights yadayada. True la, I know I shouldn't be complaining about having options when people elsewhere in the world are getting oppressed or simply lack any choice in their lives. But SOMETIMES, I feel like life would be easier if we all knew what to do next. Not necessarily better, but probably much less complicated.

I guess there's no way to actually avoid change and choice, since they'll find their way into your life somehow or another. But if anyone has any tips on dealing with them, I'm all ears. D:

I recently realised just how uncomfortable I was with change.

It sounds stupid, doesn't it? Change is everywhere, all the time. There is change in the weather, in the food we eat, in the people we talk to. We face it throughout our lives, sometimes consciously and sometimes not. I feel like I should have become mostly accustomed to it by now, of things being in flux and never remaining the same.

Yet the thought of having to adjust and adapt just makes me twitchy. I guess it's not so much the arrival of new things which scares me, but rather the prospect of losing what is familiar and near. The thought of not being able to go back to my equilibrium-the place of safety I'd grown comfortable in-terrifies and excites me in equal measure, which is an odd sensation to bear. I guess there's a conflict because I told myself at the start that I wanted to get out of my comfort zone this year and make full use of opportunities thrown my way, but now I think that's easier said than done. -_- I do want to venture into foreign places and situations and conversations and learn more about what is around me. That hasn't changed; I want to be open to new possibilities. But it's hard trying to figure out just how big a step I'm willing to take and whether it's a step in the right direction or not.

While we're here, I should also mention how choices scare me too. I do remember writing about it before lol that goes to show how little I have changed.

It's just that I hate the feeling of making decisions, because of opportunity cost. (Hah! Econs) If I take option A, that would mean option B is closed off. No big deal, but what if option B was better?? It wouldn't matter in situations where a do-over was possible, but most of the time our decisions are pretty much irreversible, aren't they? You can pick apple juice over orange juice, realise you don't like it, then go back and get orange juice instead. But you're not gonna get back the money you spent on that apple juice. And sometimes when you return, there's no more orange juice left.

At this point you're probably going to nag at me to get over myself and be thankful for freedom of choice since it's like human rights yadayada. True la, I know I shouldn't be complaining about having options when people elsewhere in the world are getting oppressed or simply lack any choice in their lives. But SOMETIMES, I feel like life would be easier if we all knew what to do next. Not necessarily better, but probably much less complicated.

I guess there's no way to actually avoid change and choice, since they'll find their way into your life somehow or another. But if anyone has any tips on dealing with them, I'm all ears. D:

My name is Felicia and my dearest ambition is to bounce on clouds while eating Twix.

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